Last week my sweet husband took me on a beach vacation. We left behind the holiday hustle to take in sun, sea and sanity. You'll never guess what rolled in with the tide...

It took a little while to let go of all the "baggage" we had in our heads. No worries about work, schedules, bills, ringing phones, chickens, ducks, dogs and our mini pig. As much as I enjoy cooking, I was more than happy to be served my meals. It seemed that every 5 minutes, I found myself thanking my husband for this amazing treat. There simply aren't words for my immense gratitude.

Once we checked in, unpacked our things, changed into our bathing suits and found ourselves on the beach, I LOST IT. I lost it ALL! I lost the sound in my head that told me to check the time. I lost the ability to force myself to stay awake when my body wanted to slumber. I lost my fear of missing appointments. I lost all sense of "things," except basic needs.

How refreshing it was for us to sit side-by-side, while taking in the subtle sea breeze and the warmth from the tropical sun. After gazing at the ocean for quite some time, I was taken aback by a simple, yet profound message. It was like a note in a bottle tossed up from the sea. A serendipitous surprise that was there all along- awaiting our discovery. It brought a spirit of hopefulness and awe we all should cling to tightly, especially at this time of year.

Like a rhythmic reminder, I watched and listened as the tide crashed in, then gently rolled back to sea. No matter where my thoughts tried to go, no matter what time of day or night, the ocean and sand did what they've done since the beginning of time; their simple, back and forth, giving and taking, dutiful dance. This soulful sharing between two unknowing objects. There is no begging interchange. No words, no bargaining. A simple understanding, an innocent deal, just simple bartering. This is nature at its best, doing all it knows how to do.

Then, it dawned on me. This dance is so similar to our lives. When the tide comes crashing in against the rocks, it is akin to grief meeting grief. A fearful fluid that is bound head-on for a fearless, bully of a boulder. It took me back to the feeling of the abuse I endured; I was the sea water on a fateful course, bound for mother's violent, abrasive, shores ...my entire emotional being reduced to tiny bits of mist- disappearing into thin air. But soon, miraculously, all the little pieces of me came back together, decidedly rolling back to the sea. Back... Returning from where it came, not run-aground to surrender to the shore, like an abandoned boat-wreck.

Sometimes, you see, there are no rocks; just a smooth path for this miraculous meeting. A wave of frothing sea water rolls in, then gently glides, like a sailboat in an even wind, back to the sea. Just an innocent interchange. All is well.

Life is that way. At times we slam into a destination of destruction; the ocean, however, has no fear. We are not spared. There is no reluctance or refusal. Time and time again, with full-force it meets the rocks, leaving a brilliant wreckage of spray and sand that eventually find their way back to the sea.

Mostly though, our daily tide is likened to the pendulum on a grandfather clock, swinging back and forth, rolling in and back out...Day in and day out, same old, same old... But then, when you take the time to really see, you find the unique beauty of what washes in! A glorious bounty of shells, sea glass and soft, smooth pebbles lying on the sand, like precious gifts. We can collect and string them, to wear like a pearl necklace. That is how we survivors are. We don't wait for others to come bearing gifts; we decorate our own souls. That's just what we do. We survive.

I gained a perspective I never expected to find- from such simplicity. Life will ebb and flow. Some days our tide crashes in and other days we find a tranquilness of spirit and notice the gifts at our feet.

At this time of gift-giving that for many of us often turns stressful, lonely, and painful, we need to give ourselves the gift of forgiveness and healing. Try to find time and a quiet place to gather yourself. No matter where you are in your journey away from abuse, know that your tide will not always be bound for the rocks. You will soon find yourself on a joyous journey, ready to greet the warm sand. Free of any emotional encumbrance, whole and humbled, you will then happily slide back to sea. Yes, those days WILL come, my friends. Just like the tide.